De France, avec l'amour

If I thought having visitors with a toddler, who cooked, cleaned, watched after my children, rented and drove their own car, did their own laundry and some of ours, and generally took care of themselves while enjoying beautiful Barbados was tough, I could not be prepared for the visit of Didier's mother and brother for their two week stay.  Not since Virginie was a newborn and Lily had begun her struggle as the jealous older sister, have I had so little sleep.  Just when I thought it was not possible for me to have more to do, I am trying to keep up our household with the addition of two adults, one in the Master Bedroom, the other in the guesthouse, who speak primarily/only French all day long.  As is expected, when one's family comes to visit, especially one's Belle-Mere, all details are to be taken care of by the hosts.  Read Didier and me.  Didier is doing all the driving and cooking.  I am doing all the rest.  And all the rest is in addition to the care of Lily and Virginie who have begun a two week break from school and are home for most of the day.

We are six people, four adults and two children, scrambling around the island in one car as a rental car has not been pursued.  We are two different meals (You think the kids want to eat a seafood pasta with calamari, crab, and shrimp?) , lots of dishes and no dishwasher, well other than me or anyone else who might like to volunteer to get their hands in the murky water.  We are trips to the beach, to all points of interest, to four coasts, to swimming lesson catch ups, and back for nap times.  We are speaking and listening in French, heat rising as semi-cool Barbados "winter" has begun to give way to blazing sunshine and humidity.  We are different parts of a family, but we are indeed family.  And you do for family.

While I am blotto, this has been magical for the girls and, I hope, for Didier's mother.  We dreamed that she and Jean, Didier's father who could not make the trip, would have the kind of time that my parents have often had with the girls.  It is no secret that none of us is getting any younger and at 78 and 81 respectively, Paulette et Jean, Didier's parents, are up there.  They are not in bad health, but not great either and are certainly mentally active, but our living in the Caribbean while they spend their days in France make frequent travel difficult, and time has gone by quickly.  To get to Barbados, Paulette and Didier's older brother had a five hour train ride to Paris, then a 6 to 7 hour flight to Martinique, where they stayed overnight with a friend as there was no suitable hotel for them there, a fifteen minute flight to St. Lucia and finally another fifteen minutes to Barbados.  That's quite a trip for an elderly lady.  Add to that the jetlag and extraordinary humidity and you can imagine how courageous it was for her make the trip for us.

Creating memories can be hard work.  I have been happy to practice my French and see if the Rosetta Stone is really working.  It is.  And even more excited that Lily and Virginie are hearing their father's mother tongue spoken and tuning their ears to it.  In the first days, they began calling me "Maman" because Grandma in French is "Mami" pronounced similarly to "Mommy" and they wanted to be sure that we knew to whom they were speaking and making demands.  Of course, I knew.  But I can say that Virginie demands that it is Mami who gives her her medicine or helps to brush her teeth and Lily asks Mami to do puzzles with her and look at the animals in her drawings.  Maman gets to get up in the middle of the night for water, trips to the potty, and early morning stories or TV watching...as it should be.

We have seen Barbados again from another set of eyes and while I have come to love the picturesque landscape, I have never counted all the flowers or marveled at every bird and vista.  But I have pushed my chest out in pride at the girls' swimming, been thankful that the coconut guys came just in time for a performance for Paulette, and that Mr. Arthur, the pool maintenance guy is such a great character.  All of this and the love from les petites has given Paulette more memories to share, more life to consider, more love to receive.  Even through my tired eyes, I can see the beauty of this. 


(c)  Copyright 2011.  City Mom in the Jungle.